Lord, Have Mercy (Gospodi, pomiluj) — The piece of Orthodox music most special to me. The singing of Plovdiv's Church Choir "Sv. Troica" was initially recorded by Dr. Emiliyan Stankov for a Bulgarian CD called Tebe Poem in 2008 and originally uploaded online with the description "A very old anonymous piece of Bulgarian Orthodox Church music. It was written between the 9th and the 16th century in a secluded monastery somewhere on the Balkans. Please treat with respect." Over time, I aquired three dueling visions it conjures in my mind:

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I was introduced to it from playing the Flash game The Infinite Ocean as a child, during the month we were homeless after being forced out of Turkey by the government and lived with a friend in Hoyerswerda while looking for an apartment in Forst in accordance with the vision I had. Those cold mornful corridors became where the singing took me.

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A few years later, while searching for the song, I encountered a Youtube video uploaded by a family living in some rural part of America, showing photos of their farm before/after some sort of great storm as the song played, to commemorate all they'd lost from it. I saved the link but it seems that they took the video offline sometime in 2024, not intending for it to be public. I've tried putting the link I saved into archive searches with no avail.

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Eventually, in early 2025 I got brief access to the family photo archive. The precepices of my memory were given objective form. Places I passed through barely knowing how to walk are now in little squares I fully control. Places like this Macedonian Orthodox church I've allowed you a window into, from the view of my parents in the '00s.